Today’s blog is going to be a completely different from my typical blog. I want to explain what it’s like to work with me as a Coach. I typically get several emails a week asking questions about my coaching style, how sessions with me work, and what people can expect. I absolutely LOVE working with women who are ready to change their lives! Typically, the clients I work best with are people who have experienced some level of a traumatic event in the past, they are women who don’t take spectacular care of themselves, and women who are hard workers. That doesn’t mean that every one of the clients I work with matches these categorizations, but these are just the common characterizations of the people I typically work with. My clients are consistently surprised and pleased with how down to earth and practical our sessions together are. In each session, the client walks away with an action plan of things to take them closer to their long-term goals. I have had many clients tell me that they find it easy to talk to me, to open up to me, and connect with me.
When I first began working with coaches I typically paid for many services that I never received. It was just such an anxiety-producing process for me to show up and allow people to help me. I suspect that for me, showing up and receiving these services triggered the worthiness in me, or lack thereof. I remember not feeling as if I was worthy of their time. Let me assure you very frankly, that you ARE worthy! And you will leave our sessions changed. I have worked with many coaches through the years for many different reasons. Some I have struggled with, and others were easy to connect with and helped me in great ways. I feel that my time working with other coaches has taught me a lot about how to be a great coach. It has also driven me to make sure I deliver the highest quality products and services for my clients. So you don’t have to go through some of the struggles I have in the past.
Do you know that gut-wrenching nervousness of getting ready to get on the phone with a coach or healer? The clients that I work with typically acknowledge that during our first session together, and then they tell me that all of that is gone. Most of my clients talk about how they feel as if they walk away so much calmer and more centered after our sessions.
The results of working with me sometimes look all over the map in terms of changes and success. Typically, my clients find that working with me: lowers their stress, encourages them to take action, increases their self-care, they begin choosing themselves and are more easily able to identify their own needs. The one response that I always get from clients is that they feel so valued and acknowledged because of our sessions.
There are so many misconceptions and objections that come up when people are looking at working with me. I thought it would be useful if we dispelled some of those common thought processes now. These include:
- “I don’t have the money”: I am not like most coaches (in so many ways this is true). As such I currently don’t charge any more than I charge for my in-person therapy clients. Even the person who struggles with money the most can likely find $20 a month (which boils down to 5 a week) for my group coaching program. As a person, I tend to massively over deliver, so I’m constantly making sure I’m giving people enough content and their needs are being met.
- “I’m Not Sure You Are Qualified to Help Me”: I am one of the most qualified people I know to help you. I have had a very successful psychotherapy practice for over twenty years. I have a clinical hypnotherapy certification, I am a “Certified and Reciprocal Alcohol and other Drug Counselor (CRADC), and I have a certification in the Emotional Freedom Technique. I have extensively studied Shame, Feelings, the Subconscious Mind, habits, and behaviors. I’m confident that every client I have worked with felt like their life was better because of our working together.
- “What If I Can’t Get Better”: I could have literally made an entire blog about complaints or objections that relate or boil down to not feeling worthy of being coached. Obviously that blog would be forever long. But common variations of this same thought include: I’m not worth your time, I am not capable of making a commitment, I’m not sure I’m ready, etc. Let me just assure you that NONE of these are accurate. I know and believe that you can get better, I know you are worthy of the time we would spend together (and I’m okay that you are not convinced of it’s truth yet), the only commitment you need to make is to show up and do the things I teach and encourage you to do… and when would be a better time than now? Allow me to work my magic and you just show up and do the work, it’s really that simple.
- “I Don’t Know How To Make Goals”: I can’t tell you how many people I have worked with who when we first started didn’t know how to set any goals. Let me be perfectly clear with you for a moment: YOU AREN’T EXPECT TO HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS RIGHT NOW! I mean that very literally. In the cases of people who can identify goals, we typically stick to their agenda through the coaching sessions. For those who are not necessarily able to identify specific goals we begin with me educating them on how their brain works, how habits are created and formed, as well as how to change those habits. Just simply teaching these things helped them to change in many positive ways.
- “You don’t charge as much as some of the others, so that must mean you are not as good.”: That’s not how it works at all for me. I keep my prices the same for everyone because that’s what allows me to feel good about the services I am delivering. I have worked with Coaches, Physicians, Attorneys, and College Professors. I keep my prices the same for all of them because it feels really good for me to be able to charge a price that makes sense to me. It also helps me to make sure I’m not getting “full of myself” or becoming arrogant. When I started out in the Coaching world, I made a promise to myself that I wanted to make sure I was easily accessible. While other coaches may charge enough to pay your mortgage each month, I’m more focused on the value that I deliver every time.
- “But THAT coach has written a book and is a published author – so they are better then you – Right?”: This objection is actually more common that you would imagine, and not actually very accurate at all. I have been published in Huffington Post, Elephant Journal, and a few other places. I also have a book that is being edited currently that I have written. I’d love to encourage you to actually get to know a coach (even if it’s not me) before you commit to working with them. One of the coaches I worked with in the past had a book published. That didn’t help her to deliver the promises that she made, however. It just meant she knew how to articulate herself well. I am not sure being a published author actually makes you a good coach.
- “So how do I know that you are up to date on knowledge and tools that are relevant to me today?”: This is a great question! I am constantly doing continuing education to make sure that I am in touch with the newest information that research has to offer. I do more education and training each year that most therapists that I know. Many people ask why I do so much training, and my response is typically the same. I love learning and always want to make sure I am prepared to help the clients I work with. I absolutely LOVE being able to help people. More research is being published every day about more modern ways to help. By staying up to date it helps me to be able to help you better.
- “I have been through a lot of trauma in my past, and the people I have worked with before didn’t seem to understand me, or get me. How can I be confident that you are different?”: I have absolutely been in a similar position. When I was still living in the middle of my trauma’s I couldn’t find a therapist to help me truly heal. As a coach I have studied the Central Nervous System and how that impacts trauma issues, I have developed a deep understanding of how Shame impacts the ability to heal through the traumas we experience, and I have studied how the subconscious mind plays into healing from traumas. I won’t lie to you and tell you I know with a million percent certainty that I can help you heal…but I will tell you that I can help you improve where you are at. No one deserves to live with the impact of having survived a trauma forever. On top of that, due to my trauma past and all of the training and experience I have had – I am very good at connecting with my clients and meeting them where they are at. Then leading them in a compassionate way to where they want to be and their goals.
- “My last coach didn’t deliver on their promises, and then disappeared. Is that going to happen with you?”: I wish I didn’t understand this one as much as I do! I also wish I hadn’t experienced it so many times. I think people have the best of intentions when they commit to coaching someone, but I don’t think they are always equipped to deliver those promises. I have been a very successful psychotherapist for over 20 years. My reputation is built on me showing up and doing the deal with my clients every day! I can promise you I don’t disappear and I will still be here even if you need to take a break for a while. I show up when I say I’m going to show up. It’s really important to me that you understand that I’m invested in you!
- “My last Coach just kept saying the same thing over and over again. I never felt like they understood. Will that happen with you?”: I want there to be no confusion. I’m very human and will make mistakes. However, I do a lot of checking in with the clients I work with to make sure they understand the material I am presenting to them, to make sure they know how to apply it, and that it’s relevant to their lives. I literally have so much material that even for those people who struggle to set goals for us to work on, we don’t just sit and talk about the same thing every time. We will also not spend very much time on your past. Because while it is a relevant piece of you, we can’t change it! And because we can’t change it I prefer to focus on those things we can change, such as helping you achieve your amazing future.
I hope this has given you a better picture of who I am as a Coach. I would love an opportunity to connect with you and see if we are a good fit. I am so grateful to be a part of so many people’s journey.
Jenn Bovee is a Shame Busting Coach. She helps people to remove the shackles of Shame and step into the life of their wildest fantasies. Learn more about working with Jenn here: https://www.jennbovee.com/take-action/