Posts tagged shame
What Does Shame Resilience Look Like?

So many times we throw around these terms and make assumptions that other people know what it means. I want you to understand very clearly what will happen when we work together.

Read More
Picking Who Helps You

This is not a blog I write lightly. Additionally, I want to provide a warning: if you are not in a good place, please do not read this. If you are currently triggered or recently triggered (from a trauma standpoint), then please do not read this. The very last thing in the world that I want to do is to create more harm, and subsequently hurt more people.
For over the last twenty years, I have been a...

Read More
Communicating Our Needs

Nearly twenty years ago, I facilitated a Healthy Sexuality group for women. One of the things we discussed was their personal rights. I am a huge believer that we all have personal rights and it’s okay to ask others to meet them. Imagine my surprise when I realized I was not capable of asking anyone else to meet my needs. If I’m going to be perfectly honest, I wasn’t even capable of speaking my needs. I remember clearly when my husband and I moved in together. I used to get so very frustrated by his lack of attentiveness to my needs. Countless times I would say things like, “No I didn’t tell him! If he really loves me, he should just know!!” Now that phrase absolutely stops me in my tracks.

Read More